Those Who Have Retired - I Would Like Your Advice

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clemencia2us
Posts: 11445
Joined: Fri Aug 28, 2015 9:21 am

Re: Those Who Have Retired - I Would Like Your Advice

Post by clemencia2us »

Your purpose in retirement should be to just enjoy life

What happens happens.
clemencia2us
Posts: 11445
Joined: Fri Aug 28, 2015 9:21 am

Re: Those Who Have Retired - I Would Like Your Advice

Post by clemencia2us »

Just realize that it might be a couple of years before you decide what is right for you

I think you would do good to get a part time gig.
HappyDaze
Posts: 4186
Joined: Tue Oct 15, 2019 11:11 am

Re: Those Who Have Retired - I Would Like Your Advice

Post by HappyDaze »

Beverley wrote: Mon May 31, 2021 6:21 pm From someone who has been there and done that......it is so easy to become just as busy as you were while working. Before the pandemic I had a lot going on; work, bowling, TOPS, card games, social activities....etc. Pre-pandemic I felt myself getting burnt out. I was tired. Last year I felt like I had been granted an unexpected sabbatical. The thought of no commitments and not having to be anywhere was pure heaven. I loved being able to order everything on line and having it delivered. I knew eventually my sabbatical would end because staying home 24/7 became a bit much. As things have opened up I have decided to work 3 four hour shifts a week doing yard duty at a school near me and that's it. I have quit bowling. I still go to TOPS. A lot of people I was socializing with were becoming more and more toxic (as we got closer to the election) so they had to go. I am happier being alone than being with toxic people. There seems to be a lot of them around. Most of my Facebook postings now consist of memes that I find funny.

I'm not sure how things would have ended up if the pandemic and lockdowns haven't hit. It was a time for me to become unbusy and these days I really feel like I am retired! I love it!

Bev
I hear ya, Bev. I did alright during the lockdown. I am mostly a loner and a homebody at heart - just couldn't do it on a permanent basis. Aside from the fact that I DESPISE working from home, the staying home and not seeing people/doing my usual activities was a nice break - but I know I couldn't spend years on end like that - which is why this is so concerning to me. I guess I shouldn't worry about things that aren't upon me yet and I'm sure there will be things I can do to occupy some of my time.
"All his life he tried to be a good person. Many times, however, he failed. After all, he was only human. He wasn't a dog."

Charles M. Schultz
Grannysewstoys
Posts: 4156
Joined: Thu Aug 27, 2015 9:37 pm

Re: Those Who Have Retired - I Would Like Your Advice

Post by Grannysewstoys »

I have been retired for 20 years now. I was forced to retire early due to hand problems that prevented me from typing fast or being able to do 10-key by touch.

I had plenty to do. I sew, I knit, I read, I have friends. For a few months I did the grocery shopping for a friend who was house bound.

I am house bound pretty much myself these days. I still sew, knit. The COVID lockdown has kept me more isolated.

Of course these days my so called social calendar is full of medical appointments.

Penny
frugalmom
Posts: 1710
Joined: Fri Aug 28, 2015 10:52 pm

Re: Those Who Have Retired - I Would Like Your Advice

Post by frugalmom »

Well, I retired early and became a full time stay at home mom. So finally, at home with the kids and that kept me busy for the past like 9 years or so. Now that my youngest is 16 yo and able to drive himself, my chauffeur or taxi duties have been curtailed-I was always going somewhere for them! And school activities like PTA (I was vice president so lots of work there), Moms in Prayer group, etc kept me busy too and driving more than one kid to school-at times I had three different kids in three different schools.Other kids were grown.

But now as the youngest is growing up and acts like an adult really, I honestly kind of miss my time with him. He used to kiss me on the cheek when he got out of the car in middle school-in high school, he no longer does it getting out of the car :? . And he does his own thing, out with his friends or a girl he likes now and my dd comes home and goes out and it is only my dh and me home alone.

BUT BOTH of us have to keep busy-we cannot sit still for long - and I hate being bored. So really hard during the pandemic-but I am constantly doing chores! My dh's constant phrase is "our work is never done and never ending!" It is one thing after another! Plus my 16 yo son's business is an official business and we sometimes spend all night packing things up and shipping it worldwide like the other day I was getting sleepy and tired bc lol sad to say, when 10:30 hits, my body knows and I start getting tired and it was already midnight! I was yawning and dozing off that my son told me to go to sleep that he will do the rest! The next day we filled two post office big rolling carts full of orders!

Then I have to also help my mom with her finances and apartment rentals which I am advertising this week and negotiating with renters,getting the apt ready,etc. I also help her with dr appts and she will be having knee surgery and basically dealing with problems I need to take care of when I find out things while looking over her finances (like she bought 4 plots yet got only certificates for two and they would not return my calls for a month til I blasted them on Yelp(I am an Elite Yelper) and then magically they contact me that night and the woman apologizes like in 5 different calls to my mom and me! BUT like the certificate after paying over 40k plus,is only under my mom's name and they want 500.00 each plot to transfer the name to the family member(so 1500.00 after she paid so much already!?) I told them why didn't you say that upfront to my mom, she would have given the names right then bc she doesn't need all 4 plots for herself alone-it doesn't make sense!? So had to work that all out-basically they are crooks trying to get more out of you and they now have my mom set on a 30k coffin(her plot already came with one, but she was told she would go to heaven with the nicer coffin-I asked who told you that!? Of course, the funeral person :shock: ! I told her use the money for something like a trip when you are ALIVE,heck buy a car and I will bury you in that car at least you get some use out of it! Sheesh! I also said to Mom I do not think buying a 30k coffin will get you to heaven-it does not work that way (must be some feng shui type of thing!).

Then my dh has been having chest pains for this past week, and so tomorrow, going for a nuclear test for a few hours they said; and I have to get my own labs and go to the pharmacy for myself. This week have an Elite Yelper event and also have to make a reservation now for this-Zumba classes! I haven't done one for so long-this should be interesting-hope my back does not go out! :shock: But I want to get back into it and I just signed up my son for the summer, so he could go swimming during the summer. I always wanted a pool but never did-still want one but the kids said they are grown and my dh says it will cost too much money to build one and for maintenance esp if he dies, and we are in a drought so guess that is a no! So figure a summer membership is cheaper than a pool payment. So had to sign up an adult with a minor-so I am just going to stay in the back, so lol I do not make a fool of myself! At home, I just walk 10k steps usually in my court or at the park going up and down these big hills (my incline), but I love dancing. Maybe I can get into the other classes or do tennis or something (although I heard that people are serious about their tennis and they have competitive teams, so they may not want me to slow them up bc it is like starting all over again!).

I used to be good at dancing and kickboxing classes,etc-one friend I went with fell off the step one time in the middle of class but we were in the back-it was so funny we kept giggling like schoolgirls! I told her what goes on in the gym, stays in the gym lol (a take on that Las Vegas commercial!). So I need laughter like that again-I don't like to be so serious esp as we get older! I like to keep myself happy,laughing and smiling! Esp trying to get my dd who broke up with her "love" and helping her out of her depression which is hard for me to deal with!? Idk what really to say bc I never faced that situation really over heartbreak,but I know for my sanity I need to laugh and get all that intensity out of me(of course, not in front of her but on my own). The man cheated on her but she still wants the no good guy(I am trying to be nice-he is a scumbag!) and my heart breaks for her and I worry about her!

Then my OTHER dd is graduating next week so we are doing that and celebrating with just a family party. Hate to shortchange her, but bc of Covid we are not having a big celebration on our immediate family bc we are all vaccinated except the babies. Usually I have basketball as well, but this year he did not join since he has his business and weird symptoms going on ( after numerous tests,etc they think it is a stigmatism and concussive symptoms).

So beside graduation, we have Father's day,just had a Memorial Day bbq with my grandbabies coming over (now they call me "grandma" that was a hard word for me to hear-lol-bc I look young and was not ready to be a grandma yet since I am still a mom to young ones! And we also have two birthdays (dad and my one heartbroken dd have the same bday-but she doesn't want to celebrate her bday :( !) So as you can see I am quite busy and I had planned to read a lot,but my eyes now need reading glasses which don't really work that well and gives me a headache after awhile so sad to say I do have a bunch of books ready to read but hard for me to read them! As I say this, just sitting next to me on my desk are 11 books on my right side and 8 books on my left side! Not including 4 bookcases full of books. I have been trying to read the Bible in full for the past many years and still have not even gotten far :( but I want too-but hard for me to see that too which is even smaller!

Also just got done with smog checks for cars and my little 23 ft motorhome (which we kept going back and forth if we should sell and took days to clean and get a battery,smog check,registration,etc) and repairs done on other car. So as you see life is busy full of stuff to always do-and plenty of headaches along the way actually! Things to repair and fix like my toilet, bedframe recently and a long list of to dos!

So basically what I am saying is even in retirement it seems there is always PLENTY of things to do-in fact, too much and NOT even FUN things to do! I need to do MORE FUN things I told my dh, for us it is always just WORK. We were waiting to retire and finally travel, but my dh's body is not cooperating with bad knees (waiting for him to be off blood thinners after the heart attack and stents placement) and hurting wrists. And then Covid hit so we are still waiting to travel :(-my bucket list is Italy and Greece! His is England/Scotland and Pakistan (relatives in all of these places-just to see one last time as he hasn't seen anyone for 50 years or so). LIfe is what you make it I guess,so I need to make it more fun than work lol but it seems work is always the one coming up! Does anyone else deal with this or have this problem!? Maybe I am doing something wrong!? Please enlighten me!!! Or what else I can do!? I don't think I can add anything more on my plate! Maybe I need to go back under quarantine again lol it seemed more manageable then!? Because then I couldn't go out and see anyone or do anything!
ohjodi
Posts: 1444
Joined: Sun Aug 30, 2015 3:57 pm

Re: Those Who Have Retired - I Would Like Your Advice

Post by ohjodi »

What I WISH I could do, but can't due to physical limitations, is to get a mini-van, rig up a bed in the back, and just take trips to anywhere for about a week or so, now and then.

I'd visit some interesting towns, sites, or some not so interesting. Chill out at a camp site somewhere, with my drive through food, lol, or sleep in a friend's driveway. I'd love to batten down the hatches in a torrential rain storm because I love them.

For security, I'd get some sort of US Army decal or two for the back. And a Pittsburgh Steelers seat cover for the front passenger seat............nobody hates the Steelers or its fans, and it will look like a guy owns the van, LOL
ohjodi
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