I'm Lost and Overwhelmed

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I'm Lost and Overwhelmed

Post by LogicsHere »

Well after about 6-8 weeks of my mom bouncing between home and nursing home, I am at the point where I have to finally accept that I can no longer take care of her and I'm lost, heart-broken and overwhelmed. I'm in tears frequently and am angry at everyone and everything. It's killing me inside.

The last several weeks she has started to develop mood swings of a Dr. Jekyl/Mr. Hyde nature. Never had I experienced or expected to see my mother with such hatred for me. I know this isn't really her, but the hateful words hurt just the same.

They have put her on Depakote to eliminate the mood swings and an antidepressant which they stopped after I had them ask the doctor if was possible an episode she had could have been caused by it.

I now find myself having to close out her apartment and get the ball rolling for the Medicaid filing. I'm not happy with the place I currently have her in (she had either a syncope or seizure episode on Thursday and NO one got in touch with me). I only found out yesterday when I went to check on some paperwork I wanted send to another nursing home in the area. It's a very small place so I'm hoping I can get her in as I can't leave her where she is.

I'm feeling very "fragile" right now and find myself just spinning my wheels and getting no where. I'm so lost.

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Re: I'm Lost and Overwhelmed

Post by Jackielou »


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Re: I'm Lost and Overwhelmed

Post by rinty »

I just wanted to say how sorry I am that you are feeling this way. Hoping that you can find the strength you need to cope with this............eliminate EVERYTHING that's not a Must - Do and put the things you HAVE to do on project status.

I wish this was easier for you. You are such a good daughter for your DM. I know she can't tell you right now but she really does appreciate all you are doing for her. Know that. (((Hugs and Prayers)))

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Re: I'm Lost and Overwhelmed

Post by 11cats2beagles »

Dear Logics,

I am so sorry. You are a good and loving daughter. Please take good care of yourself. Thinking of you.

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Re: I'm Lost and Overwhelmed

Post by floridacatlover »

Logics, I will be thinking of you and put you in my prayers. (((Hugs)))

I can totally relate to your tears, anger and feeling fragile. I hope there is someone you can lean on in real life but I (and I know all of us here) are here for you any time.

I would say take things one day at a time. If possible, put your mother's apartment on the back burner even if you have to pay an extra month's rent.

Others here know more about applying for Medicaid but I would say let a lawyer, if you have one, do much of the work. My dad was private pay and in my uncle's case the nursing home handled the paperwork. I've found with my uncle that the nursing homes will do much of the Medicaid paperwork because they want their money. But because you want to move your mom to a different nursing home that might complicate things.

As others have said, take care of yourself. Easier said than done I know.

Getting old sucks big time.

(((More hugs)))

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Re: I'm Lost and Overwhelmed

Post by AnneX »

Dear Logics:

i'm so very sorry.

I know nothing of how nursing homes and medicaid work in the U.S, so I can offer no practical advice, just loving thoughts.

Give in to your anger and grief when you need to, and take any help that is offered you.


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