Narrowing My Focus

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ChristmasTrees
Posts: 1435
Joined: Fri Aug 28, 2015 12:53 am

Re: Narrowing My Focus

Post by ChristmasTrees »

randamax wrote:
Sun Dec 29, 2019 10:53 am
I saw something kind of funny, but also quite telling, on facebook the other day:

(this is sung to the tune of 'If You're Happy And You Know it Clap Your Hands')

If you're happy and you know it, over-think
If you're happy and you know it, over-think
If you're happy and you know it, give your brain a chance to blow it
If you're happy and you know it, over-think

I think we all have a tendency to do this - a lot! Generally speaking, we are way too hard on ourselves. I'm totally with you on not worrying about achieving it all, managing it all, trying to make it all perfect, and being all things to all people. Those things are completely unrealistic and we are setting ourselves up for failure if these things are our end goal.

Instead, I choose to focus on those things that bring joy, love, peace, harmony, and beauty to my life. I guess you could say I've narrowed my focus so that these things are my primary goals.

What does that mean? To me it means that I choose to focus on the most important aspects of the different areas of life. For instance, having a tidy, well-organized home is important to me. To reach that goal, I focus on keeping cupboards and drawers organized, swiffering/sweeping/vacuuming the floors, keeping the kitchen and bathrooms clean and sanitized, maintaining laundry, and generally tidying up around the house. I don't do it all in one day - that would be overwhelming - instead, I accomplish one or two of those tasks each day. I know that if I keep up with things, they don't take that long to do. For things I don't want to do regularly, I treat myself to the luxury of having a cleaning service come in once a month to do the heavier cleaning - baseboards, scrubbing tile, cleaning blinds, etc. For things that are heavier duty or need to be done only occasionally, Kevin helps out. Should I be washing down walls, cleaning windows, scrubbing screens, waxing floors, etc? Maybe, but they just aren't all that important to me in the scheme of things, so I choose not to do - or WORRY about - them.

I try to apply that logic in most areas of my life and things pretty much have a way of working themselves out.
Randa, That little tune IS very telling. What the heck do we all really need to be happy? A safe home, clean water, enough good food, and especially, good health.
Awesome post...thank you.

ChristmasTrees
Posts: 1435
Joined: Fri Aug 28, 2015 12:53 am

Re: Narrowing My Focus

Post by ChristmasTrees »

HappyDaze wrote:
Sat Dec 28, 2019 11:59 am
Mercy, with it being the end of a year and beginning of a new one, I am thinking and OVER-thinking so much. One things I am working on is acceptance of the fact that I can NOT do it all, achieve it all, manage it all, make it all perfect, etc.

So - hard as it is - I am NOT trying to do any of those things. I am narrowing my focus to a few VERY specific goals. To keep them specific, instead of saying "be more neat organized", I am saying "stop leaving things in the car" and "stop leaving your earrings everywhere".

Instead of saying "I will have healthier habits" I am saying "I will MOVE for a least 150 minutes a week" and "I will not eat foods that are processed or contain added sugar".

Oh friends - how do you maintain your focus, narrow it down and concentrate on the more specific?
This is a great post Sheila. DH and I have been discussing this lately. We both recognize the fact that we try to do too much...and it is wearing us out.
We are trying to figure out what is most important, and then scale back on the rest.

randamax
Posts: 204
Joined: Fri Aug 28, 2015 11:05 pm

Re: Narrowing My Focus

Post by randamax »

ChristmasTrees wrote:
Mon Dec 30, 2019 12:52 pm
Randa, That little tune IS very telling. What the heck do we all really need to be happy? A safe home, clean water, enough good food, and especially, good health.
Awesome post...thank you.
And thank you for your kind comments!

HappyDaze
Posts: 372
Joined: Tue Oct 15, 2019 11:11 am

Re: Narrowing My Focus

Post by HappyDaze »

littlemiss63 wrote:
Sat Dec 28, 2019 2:21 pm
Shelia that is my goal for the New Year as well. I can't do everything that two people use to do and I've got to get use to that idea and focus on the things that are important. I now do about 25 extra chores a month that when DH was alive he did them. I have also just gotten around 15 hours a week removed from my bank of time with my dialysis treatments. Treatments are 12, but the time spent driving there and sometimes having to wait until my blood pressure levels out would be at least 15.

I had written earlier in the week on the daily check-in that I was struggling to keep up with things in my household. I have always managed well to get things done in a timely manner and now it just wasn't happening. I took a day and timed everything that I did and that helped me see where I could do a better job.

I have a plan and I'm going to do everything that I can to stop adding to my work. Sometimes instead of hanging up my coat, I will throw it on the couch and it not only depresses me to see it laying there, but it wouldn't take me any longer to hang it up when I walk into the house. It's not like the coat closet is in another country. I am going to stop washing my bed sheets weekly. I don't care which side of my bed I sleep on so I will sleep on one side one week and the other side the next. The bed is clean when I get in it at night, fresh shower and pajamas and it probably wouldn't hurt to sleep on the same side a couple of weeks. I know people that only change their linens once a month. I like a good fresh smell to much to do that. Unless, I have friends over or company comes there is no need to vacuum my formal dining room or living room more than once a month. Nobody ever walks on the floor and I had vacuumed before Mr. B came. I vacuumed this morning and picked up nothing but a little carpet fuzz which isn't dirt. I am going to wash once a week only. After getting my new utility room I was washing twice a week as the machine adjusts the water level to your load of clothes. I don't have a full load at times and would use that feature and it would save me time to just wash when I have full loads of linens or clothes.

Here's wishing everyone a Happy New Year and one that we can all accomplish our goals.
Littlemiss, thank you for your feedback! I do your "coat thing" with my jewelry - I leave it laying everyplace - and it would take me no longer to hang it up where it belongs. Also on the rare occasions when I drive my car, I am guilty of leaving things in it - my lunch bag, the mail, etc. - and that causes me more work in the long run.

Hope you are feeling well my friend.

HappyDaze
Posts: 372
Joined: Tue Oct 15, 2019 11:11 am

Re: Narrowing My Focus

Post by HappyDaze »

randamax wrote:
Mon Dec 30, 2019 10:19 am
Thank you for that! I really appreciate your kind words :)
LOVE that little "jingle" randa!!

HappyDaze
Posts: 372
Joined: Tue Oct 15, 2019 11:11 am

Re: Narrowing My Focus

Post by HappyDaze »

Yet another way I have decided to "narrow my focus" - I am giving up a lot of the "survey sites" I participate with and just sticking with the ones that are the "most profitable" - I would rather do well and "get 'em all" on a few sites than try to keep up with so many.

Life is good.

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